I am writing this message the morning before Yom Kippur (the Day of Atonement/At-ONE-met, the most sacred day in the Jewish calendar). My community has a daily morning minyan (prayer service), now on Zoom, and I am subscribed to the What’s App group that informs us whether more people are needed to make the minyan (ten people are needed to say certain key prayers). My son went off to school and I got the message that more people were needed, and I felt called to show up. Today, I was the 10th person. I was moved to experience that my very presence made the difference for this communal moment.

When we got to the daily Amidah (a set of 19 blessings that are central to the service), I found myself drawn to the words of the 6th blessing — mochel v’soleach atah— which essentially means that “You are a forgiving God”. I started chanting these words. Tears came. I also added the final words from the blessing— chanun hamarbeh lisloach— You are gracious in Your forgiveness. I have prayed these words many times. Today they found a deep place in my heart, a deeper knowing that God forgives, God loves, that I am loved in my imperfections and mistakes and misjudgments. The message is both personal and universal— God loves everyone, each of us, including those whom we judge and those whom we fear.

I have been working on a performance piece telling the Biblical story of Jonah (stay tuned for a recording), which is traditionally read at the end of Yom Kippur, and have been sitting with how hard it is for Jonah to accept God’s forgiving nature towards the people of Nineveh, who had been acting in wicked ways. It’s so hard for Jonah to reconcile that God would forgive this community that he declares that death would be better than life. This story touches on a deep truth about human nature— we can get stuck in our limited perspective. The words of this chant, and so many of the prayers of Yom Kippur, challenge us to crack open our perspective, to see through God’s loving and forgiving eyes— both towards ourselves, towards our loved ones, and even towards those whom we might consider enemies.

Gmar hatimah tovah. May you be sealed in the Book of Life and Forgiveness!

mochel v’soleach atah chanun hamarbeh lisloach מוֹחֵל וְסוֹלֵֽחַ אָֽתָּה חַנּוּן הַמַּרְבֶּה לִסְלֽוֹח

Download chant here